The Elements of Harmony
/“He needs touch, she needs affirmation”, a couple will tell me with conviction. They read the book, took the quiz years ago. Yet this knowledge hasn’t gotten them very far, as they sit in my office looking for more. I bet you know your partner’s astrological sign, enneagram type, personality type, relationship language. Ever wish you knew more than just one piece of information about what your partner needed in your relationship? Ever wish your partner knew more about you as well? And how this information might change day to day?
If you are interested in a more fluid and effective measure of determining what a relationship needs day to day, read on. A recent study refuting the concept of love languages outlined how one of the most popular concepts to understanding your partner is not very effective, despite the popularity and catchiness of the terminology.
I’ve been working hard on the answer to this. How can a couple obtain a simple assessment of what each needs, as often as they wish? And then be offered a script to guide them to the remedy? And then use this script to feel more connected time and time again?
I’m very excited to announce Dance Of Hearts.
Photo by dance of hearts - Lauren and Kendall - Austin TX
The mission of Dance of Hearts is to enrich the lives of couples everywhere.
Every relationship is a dance; an intricate and beautiful rhythm of movement between two hearts.
Protection of this dance requires a couple to attune and attend to the needs of each partner, as well as the dance itself.
Our Love Quiz is intended for the purpose.
Our unique Love Quiz ™ evaluates each of your needs in real time. It’s quite common for couples to feel off and not be able to put a finger on the pulse of what they need, or describe it effectively. No worries: anytime you are wondering what your partner needs, take the quiz. Anytime you want to communicate what you are needing, take the quiz. The Love Quiz evaluates you and your partner on the 7 core elements of harmony: Intimacy, cherishing, healing, knowing, meaning, fun time and sensuality. Once you receive your results, you can start with our initial action steps, or be on the lookout for our date night solutions, conversation cards or date night dance program. Stay tuned for release dates for each!
In the meantime, I will be outlining the “elements of harmony” that provides the foundation of our relationship system and Love Quiz on social media for the next few weeks. These elements have been inspired by my 20+ years of work with clients, my experience and training as a Certified Gottman Therapist, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy/Attachment training as well as my training as a Certified Daring Way Facilitator (based on the work of Brené Brown).
The Elements of Harmony in the Dance of Hearts System represent the core pillars of a healthy relationship:
Intimacy: Grow your emotional intelligence, empathic skill, self awareness and ability to lean into vulnerability.
Fun: Cultivate a sense of fun, adventure and play in your relationship.
Meaning: Develop a sense of aligned meaning through exploration of values, rituals, dreams and goals.
Knowing: Improve your knowledge of and curiosity about your partner.
Healing: Strengthen respect, trust, boundaries, listening skills, resilience and communication.
Sensuality: Fan the flames of your romantic passion, physical intimacy and sex life together.
Cherishing: Enhance your sense of fondness, admiration and gratitude.
Relationships are dynamic; the balance of these elements can shift daily. Awareness and daily care of these shifts helps couples stay attuned to each other. This sense of connection makes the dance flow more smoothly and creates a unified rhythm.
By cultivating these seven elements, couples can strengthen their bond and be their fully functioning selves. Each element is crucial for a resilient, fulfilling relationship, harmonizing into a beautify symphony for the dance of hearts.
Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, Tik Tok for weekly ideas to enrich each of these elements. We will be sharing conversation ideas, date inspiration and even actual dance instruction!
I’ll be focusing on two elements per week until our official release of our Dance of Hearts card system, coming this fall!
If you would like to get started and take the quiz, you can find it here at www.danceofhearts.com
The dance floor is yours!
